When something good turns bad

I am incrediably discouraged right now. I first thought that what I was thinking and feeling was ok but now I realized that what I am feeling is so impossible and so childish that I find myself very upset with myself.
Can I ask this? Is it possible to love someone when you haven't even met them? Is it possible to and ok to admire someone so much? No, it isn't. I find out today that I need to re-focus myself and why I am here. I did not come here to drool over some person that doesn't even know that I exist let alone would even give me the time of the day. Who am I living for? I am living for the one true God that will love me with the best love that can never be explained.
I knew I needed to write about this, it bothers me so much... I can admire the way God is working though individual people, but they are not my God. I feel so inadaquate when it comes to seeing other people and all that they are doing for the Lord. I have done really nothing with my life. I haven't seen or experienced what most other people have experienced. I did get good grades, I wasn't popular, I don't have any cool skills. But I have a passion. Sometimes this passion can be a little out of control sometimes when its not in the right place, but I am on fire for God and what He desires for my life. I am a people lover trying to be a God-lover.
*sigh* I know that God has HIs best for me, and I can't make things that happen that would be good, but not the best. Everything will come in God's time, all I need to do is completely focus on Him and what He wants me to do with the gifts He has given me. I want to serve not for people but for the Lord. Because if my focus is on people then that love for them will edventually leave me because of my fallen nature. But if I love people because I first love God then my priority is correct.